I’ve done nothing wrong,
except become stronger.
I’ve waited so long,
to find the Light within my mind.
The lies we tell ourselves
are the most dangerous.
My own white blood cells
were confused.
What’s the enemy,
where’s the disease?
I’ve been kicked out of heaven
that’s what I believed.
Meanwhile the rejection
came from disembodied Souls.
They feared the Light.
Latching on,
feeding out of sight,
dimming my view.
Can You see me?
I’d demand, as I swore I stood alone.
My eyes blinded by loyalty
Men….. my priority
I became a servant, a waif
A disgusting basket case.
I needed to turn around,
accept & face
suicidal habits & beliefs,
that brought me so much grief.
With what strength?
I spent my attention in
the opposite direction.
Peering into the abyss,
the Black velvet void.
Getting so lost, it seemed
there was no redemption.
No forgiveness, no love for me.
So what brought me back?
The Light ….
inside of me!
Insisting I live,
instead of entering the abyss.
What a temptation,
to force myself into what
I thought would be Heaven.
Dying in a way society approved
was the exaulted view.
And, choosing to live,
Amongst the living dead
Was taught, to be a sin.
So…..
I invited in Mary Magdalene &
Quan Yin, asking:
To transmute what I used
to deem a sin.
My lower back contracted
My kidney released a stone
I had thrown Lifetimes ago.
A debt paid off
The pain,
a symbolic representation.
A reminder:
suffering comes from attachment.
Stagnant entrapment,
the absence of advancement.
I needed to know,
what I knew were lies,
& surrender to not knowing,
So the highest river can flow,
allowing Life and Light
to grow and glow
within me!
When I surrender
and reach out,
I’m reminded
what Loves about
What held me back was shame.
On Namah Shivay
Ahum Prema
Much Love and gratitude to all who watched me, saw me and held Space
Samadhi Bodhi 